October

well it is October already, this year just seem to be flying by. I don't like October for reasons i won't get into right now, just not in the mood to get into all of that at the moment. I have so many things to take care of i feel like a attach to a tread mill the just keeps going and going..... two more teeth that need work done on the (PPPPPPPPPPPPPP) i need to get to the eye doctor it has been three years and my glass's are on their last legs... i primary care doc just up and left her practice with telling her patients so now i need a new..... i have yet to find an endocrinologist that i like ( thyroid doctor ).. i need to get my brakes checked.... i could go on forever but i won't. I guess it is just Monday. sorry i am not in a better mood.

september

how can it be September already? where did the summer go? don't get me wrong i love fall weather the only problem is it is followed by winter.

well, any hoo. there is a lot going on with the career front. I have decided that i can't do the job i have anymore mostly i can't put up with other peoples crap, low pay, and poopy diapers. I have been burnt out for a while but up until recently i liked the people ( most of them have left ). A few things have happened at work over the summer that have changed me or at least the way i feel about the childcare field. so i have been thinking and looking and i decided that while i want to leave the childcare field i do still want to work in education. I have sent out 4 resumes and i have four more to send out. I am mostly applying to different public schools not for teacher positions for support staff (instructional aid, the inclusion program.......) i also sent a resume to the children's museum, and two after school programs.

I realize that the school year has already started and that most schools will already be fully staffed, but, i found that some are still looking and a few others have anticipated vacancies that they will need to fill part way through the school year. so now i just have to wait and see what happens ( of course i will keep looking ) and do some follow up.

back to the real world.....

hi, i just got home from my vacation today and i go back to work Monday. The Berkshires were fabulous, I was surrounded by mountains and had a view of the most beautiful lake. In the morning there was big puffs of fog rising up off the mountain tops and the air was soooooo clean smelling. I went for nature walks, i walked the labyrinth every day, i learned a lot about healthy foods and why they are good for us, i participated in a drumming circle, and i ate some really good food!

I left there on Thursday and went to Albany N.Y. for two days to visit my best friend who had a baby about six months ago. She said i could be auntie Donna whoo hoo i am an auntie! The baby was soooo cute she has red hair and the best smile ever. I will have to visit more often.

I got back today and i go back to work Monday. back to the real world, i don't want to can't i live in my vacation world forever? well i guess if i stayed there forever it wouldn't be much of a vacation would it. so back to the real world i go like it or not.

the berkshires ( don't know how to spell it )

hi all,

in about a week i will be going to a retreat/spa in the Berkshires!!! i went last august and loved it !!! i can't wait to go back. it was just so calming waking up and seeing the fog rise up out of the mountains. oh, yea did i mention that this place is surrounded by mountains! the food is so yummy and it is all organic and mostly vegetarian...... there's a tea bar..... i can't wait to walk the labyrinth....

There will be a lot of self reflection going on witch i think i need right now. They have lots of interesting workshops and movement classes. It is the best place to sit and knit, oh yea, there will be knitting.

I am going for three nights. Last year i went for two nights and it didn't seem to be long enough, however i think four nights would be too long for me. I had such a good time last year that i hope this year can live up to my expectations.

FOOD

Yes i am talking about food again. We all know about the bad for us things that are put in food now a days? Trans-fat ( bad for you ) preservatives ( bad for you ) and let's not forget sodium ( very bad for you ) of course i try to stay away from these things but it is hard especially since i don't like to eat tree bark lol.

There has been a lot of talk about how high fructose corn syrup is really bad for you. did you know that it actually makes you grave more sugary foods and research has suggested that it can affect the brain development of children!

The other night while eating dinner with my family i said " i wonder how hard it would be to eliminate high fructose corn syrup from my diet" my mom said " oh, that should be too hard to do " I took a look at the ingredients of the food in my house. Well half of the food in my house contains it. I went to the super market and looked at labels and this stuff seems to be in everything! If it is soooo bad for you why is it in everything? now of course i could shop at a whole foods market and pay double the price for my groceries but my retired mother and I can't really afford to do that. I am still going to try and cut back on my intake of high fructose corn syrup. I will let you know how that goes.

what to write????

let's see.... well it has been a very quick work week for me it seems to have zipped by. That is always a good thing and tomorrow is PJ day at my school that means i get to where my PJ's to work, yup that's right i get to work in my PJ's and i get to see all of the children in their PJ's whoo hoo and it is a Friday whoo hoo!
sometimes i really do like my job :)

It is supposed to be nice out this weekend :) and the brand new LL Bean store in Dedham is having a grand opening this weekend. I love that store and now there is one 15 mins. from my house whoo hoo!

well i will talk you ya later

yall have a nice night now

blah blah blah

hmmmm never thought i would be this persons out of site out of mind friend....

kinda feels like high school... you know when you can so easily be replaced by that new kid or you get told " hey gee we had so much fun at ( insert activity here ) to bad we couldn't make room for you to go too, next time for sure "

yup it's true people really do suck.

PPPPPPPPPPPPP

not in too good of a mood :(

- On the down side i need a root canal on the up side i get to keep me tooth

-down side someone important let me down i should be used to it i always end up being the expendable friend. up side? i really only need myself to be happy. while this is true it is nice to have others around who actually care how you feel.

-down side in a bad mood and sad. up side i am still looking for the silver lining and grabbing onto every little happy moment i can, as i always say " lemon aid, people, lemon aid "

-down side baby head butted me today (right where my bad tooth is). up side baby hugged me and patted me on the back and there was giggling involved

VACATION

I went on vacation to wiliamsburg Virginia for a week with my brother, this is the second time we have visited this area. It was very pretty with a lot of fun historical things to see.

the main area is the historical village it is a mile long with lots of side streets to go down. First we had a tour of the governors palace and his garden. The governors garden was my favorite, it is big and beautiful. It had a water feature and a large maze made out of tall hedges. It was designed for children to run through and find their way out but i of course could not resist running through it myself. I even started a really fun game of Marco polo with my brother and the other children had to join in.

We also visited york town Battle field and the James town settlement both very interesting. York town had a working historical farm with lots of turkeys running around.

Let's not forget the "food glorious food" One night we ate at an old time tavern, the food was yummy and the price was right but the best part of this dinner was the location. the dining area was located in the basement which is made of bricks and lit by the candles mounted on the wall. All of the staff was in colonial costumes and there was a man playing what i think was a mandolin and singing. We even had dessert MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

The last night we were there we ate at a Fancy shamcey restaurant that had a seafood buffet. My brother had 4 plates of food ( he got his moneys worth) there were king crab legs, shrimp, salmon, cod, scallops, crab cakes, honey glazed pork, grilled chicken, mashed potato's (MMMMMMMMM) home made bread, sushi ( we passed on that ) I am not a huge fan of seafood but i really enjoyed the cod fish and crab cakes the pork and chicken were good too. Oh, i made two trips to the dessert station, they had bread pudding to die for and lots of different types of mini tarts (MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM)

We took a lot of pictures too but it was with my brothers camera so i have to wait for him to put them on the computer, he won't let me do it. So once they are on the computer i will post them here :)

"He's not that into you"

o.k i have been reading the book "He's not that into you" I decided to read it because everybody is talking about it and they made a movie about. One of my friends started reading after a very bad break-up and told me that she found it enlightening and that it was good to hear the truth.

I have also participated in many many different conversations with many different people about this book. i thought to myself if this many people have this many opinions and feelings about this book ( most of them hadn't read it) than i should check it out. I have found the book to be very eye opening and at times funny.

I seem to encounter a whole lot of women that were convinced that they didn't need to read the book " oh, i'm not one of those women" they would say. I am here to say that everybody needs to read the book. Don't assume that you wouldn't put up with any of the stuff these women in the book put up with until you are in the situation, and if you have ever gone out of your way, inconvenienced yourself, or made an unnecessary sacrifice for a man just to end up with hurt feelings THEN YOU REALLY NEED TO READ THE BOOK.

I am not really sure why there seems to be soooooooo many women that are sooooo afraid to admit that they should read this book. Really people it is just a book that happens to contain information they may help keep you from making a mistake with the next guy you date.

just stop being judgemental and read the dam book.

o.k just wanted to get that off my chest

getting lots done

I had an extra long weekend five days to be exact. I got a lot of stuff done and still had time to mull around.

I finished two of my three on going projects I finished a shrug for a girl at work and i finished my sun hat

I had to frog this thing three times ahhhhhhhhh! I actually didn't mind too much because it was a small project ( A: have i been converted ? ) And i have made a lot of progress on the sweater i have been making for myself too :) My hope is that it is done by the fall.

I took take of a couple of things at the bank and mailed a few things at the post office ran an errand for my mom. I also decided that i need to go through all of the cloths that have piled up in various corners of my room. I have THREE ! bags of cloths to give to goodwill, that is a lot of cloths and i haven't even touched my closet yet!!!!

wow it sounds like i had a really boring long weekend, but i did go shopping twice, took my self to lunch on friday, lounged on my hammock multiple times, got a good buzz on saturday, took a nice walk. so i did take some time for myself to relax. :) back to work tomorrow tha's not so bad i get to see my babies :)

green

going green seems to be a big deal right now with the ozone layer dissolving and all. well every little bit helps. As an individual one can make a difference by just changing one or two things. I traded in my disposable coffee cups for a travel mug and i try to use my sub/zero water bottle when ever possible. also I recycle at home and at work we do too.

If one individual can make a difference with one little change then imagine what a large company could do, even if some of these manufactures just changed their packaging that would be a really good start. I hate when i buy something and the package is more than half empty what is up with that? My mom just recently ordered two bottles of her favorite shampoo through the mail ( you can only get it through mail order ) They shipped them in two different boxes!!!!! and each box was big enough to hold 5 or 6 bottles of shampoo!!!!!!!! my mom and i were both really pissed about the whole thing. I mean really two giant boxes when they could have used one much smaller box? really? what ere they thinking?

hello

well i don't really have a whole lot to write about i just haven't been on here in a while so i thought i should log and write something soooo let's see hmmm oh my brother and i have been talking about going away on vacation in june. we go away for a week every summer. We couldn't come up with anywhere new to visit this year so the other day he asked me if i wanted to go to williamsburg Virginia again ( we went there about 6 or 7 years ago) we had a really good time when we went there before. I said i would like to go again. last night he started looking up information on where we should stay flights there........ well this boy must have done some quick planning today ( he had the day off ) because he just told me that our trip is all planned and taken care of like 5 minutes ago. wow so i guess i am vacationing in williamsburg Virginia on June 15th. whoo hoo for me

easter

Easter is going pretty well and had a few small but fun surprises. well, just when i am convinced that my brother is thoughtless and doesn't really care he surprises with a kind gesture.

He gave my mom and i Easter baskets! didn't see that coming it was full of yumminess like chocolate bunny, Reese's pieces, jelly beans, peeps and the worlds cutest little stuffed bunny that plays two songs by making hopping sounds! omg it is soooo cute ( wow i guess i really am just a big kid whoo hoo for me) here is a picture of the little guy

isn't he cute!

and i can smell the turkey dinner that my mom is cooking MMMMMMMM

I just had a rather weird day off

I guess weird isn't the right word just very up and down. To start with i had today off , i took a vacation day ( up )

i got up this morning and it was really really nice out ( up )

Then i got a text from my co-worker telling me that today was going to be the last day in our programfor one of our children, she is one of the most fun and lovable children on the planet i didn't get to say bye or anything (down)

besides i am tired of seeing these parents do what is best for themselves without considering what is best for their child ( down )

I went to Lowe's to get some potting soil for my planting project ( up )

while i was there i noticed that the herb plants were a really good price i got basil for my mom and mint for me ( up up and up)

went to Lambert's salad bar and got the best salad ever ( UP )

Well when i got home I discover that something was leaking in our basement it was and old water tank that my dad put in decades ago (down)

we had a hard time getting a hold of anybody to come and fix it ( down)

neither my mom or i could turn the handle that would shut the water off (down)
MY next door neighbor was able to come over and turn the water off for us ( up)
my mom and brother got into an argument about the water leaking ( down )
we had really yummy corn chowder and home made corn bread for dinner and my brother and i split a Sunday cup for dessert ( up )

do you see what i mean very strange i think there was a full moon this week. My mood was all over the place i was happy then not Happy then happy then not happy very strange. However i am very proud of myself for still finding joy in my day even though it had some crap going on. ( UP )

old friends

this past Tuesday i got together for a drink with an old friend from high school. His name is tom and i haven't seen him in 14 years. I guess you could say we had a love hate friendship. We were very good friends and he did always have my back when i needed him too but we did argue not often but when we did it was loud. I think part of this had to do with how differently we viewed things and the fact that we were spending sooooo much time together that we would get on each others nerves. well any way seeing him was great. WE got to catch up i was proud of all the things he accomplished and he was proud of me and really really surprised that i had done so much.

Him and i have known each other since grade school and we had been friends since high school. I am not sure why we lost touch. He has a very busy schedule so he doesn't have a lot of free time between work, his children, his new wife, but we are going to keep in touch and he wants me to meet his wife and children at some point.

nightmares

oh, i have never been what you would call nightmare prone i generally just have very vivid dreams that are usually pleasant or at least not scary. Sometimes my dreams are rather odd and seem to relate to nothing but that is o.k. by me.

well any way when i do have a night mare it usually fairly scary. i had one last night and it went a little like this: I am outside walking through a play ground my phone rings and the I.D. says it's my brother so i answer " hi what do you want?" creepy voice on phone " I love you" ( not my brother ) ME: "who is this?!" creepy voice: " it's me, i love you" ME: " who the fuck is this?!!!!" creepy voice: " it's me i have your bother and his phone at your house, i love you" ( at this point i realize the voice is the abusive ex boyfriend) I drop the phone and run home, i got there in like two seconds, i guess time runs faster in your dreams. i get home my mom is having tea in the kitchen and my brother is not there nor is his phone. I run up to my mom and scream " he's in the house he's in the house!!!!" she has a frantic look on her face and seems to know who i am talking about with out asking any questions. i scream " we have to leave he's in the house he has J.W. he's in the house!!!!!!" we run for the back door because it is closest and the ass hole appears in the window on our door. so we book it out the front door to a neighbors house call the police ........... then i wake up in a cold sweat to the sound of my alarm clock.

You know i though i had gotten rid of him. sure i let go of him and what he did ( or so i thought) i guess the after effects can linger. all i know is that isn't the first night mare i have had with him in it and i need to find some way to get him out of my soul. I kick him out of my heart and my mind but i guess he is still in my subconsciousness.

MMMMMM chicken salad

There was some left over baked chicken breast in the fridge from Thursday nights dinner. My mom and i were hungry ( yesterday ) it was lunch time so we made the best chicken salad i have ever had!! oh, it was so good and so simple to make. Now this wasn't just regular chicken salad it had a couple of extras in it that made it so yummy.

we chopped up the chicken and mixed in mayo as usual but we also diced up some apple and walnuts and mixed them in too MMMMMMMM.

The apples give it a nice crispness with just a little bit of sweet and the walnuts give it a slight richness. Oh so yummy. I am drooling just thinking about it and there is enough left over for two more sandwiches!!!!

I think i may have a food addiction, oh well happy eating y'all

hospitals suck

yup i hate hospitals. I think that most people do. I don't like the way they smell, the confusing hallways and maps, I really don't like being a patient in one. doctors, sometimes they suck too. Why do some of them minimize your feelings about a diagnoses like it is no big deal, or the discomfort you may feel before or after certain tests or procedures. For them it's no big deal because they do these things all the time, there not the ones being poked and prodded but for the patient it can be very scary or uncomfortable.

o.k just wanted to get that off my chest.

men stupid stupid men....

o.k. i just don't get it, how can they be so obliviously stupidly clueless. oh, and not to mention cheap let's not forget the cheapness.

I met some "boys" through the internet i went out with one of them last weekend. He seemed really nice, we talked on the phone for about an hour, it sounded like he was interested. So we make a date to go to the Gardner museum ( he picked it ). We met at the entrance by the front desk, he was kind of cute in a nerdy way ( that is one of my types ) we shake hands walk up to the counter to pay our admission ( it cost twelve dollars for one adult that's a pretty good bargain ) I quickly found out that i had to pay for myself!!!!! cheapo couldn't cough up 12$ ? this isn't the first time something like this has happened to me. so, we go through the museum had nice conversations about the art work, that is really all we talked about. Well it gets better. we walk through the gift shop towards the exit and stop for a moment to look at another painting. I ask if he knows where the bathrooms are? he does, i start to head to the bathroom and he says "well we are all set here so i will be going now" and shakes my hand again!!!! cheapo couldn't even walk me to the door? hello couldn't walk with me out of the entrance? forget about he's not that into me I'm not that into him!

I am totally convinced that all of the good men are either taken or gay.
This whole dating thing is very tiring, dating is supposed to be fun isn't it? I just want to go out with someone nice, I'm cute it shouldn't be that hard to find someone nice.

baby stuff finished !

As i may have mentioned before my best friend had a baby girl about a week or two ago. Since one of the grandmothers knits and the other crochets i decide to sew a few things for the baby. I had planned on finishing before she was born but life tends to get in the way so i just finished this past weekend. here are some pics I made two bibs ( i decide to do this without a pattern i guess i like to do things the hard way) a burp cloth ( you can never have too many of those) and a turtle blanket ( my friend sue loves loves loves turtles ! )

now all i have to do is mail them that should take me more than a week or two to get around to that.

things i am happy about....

I decided to make a list of things i am happy about ( this usually puts me in a good mood). let's see how long it gets, well even if i end up with two or three things that is still good.

1. I have a three day weekend coming up that is always a reason to dance
2. it is Friday
3.i am almost done with my friends hiking socks, they have been a pain to make
4.it was warm out three days in a row
5. almost all of the snow has melted
6.i will be baking cookies tomorrow
7. i got home tonight and dinner was waiting on the table for me and my family to eat
8. and last but certainly not least my best friend had a baby girl last week!!! i get to be an auntie whoo hoo!!!!

hmmm 8 things that is pretty darn good!
i feel better all ready :)

snow snow everywhere

hi y'all,

Well we seem to have plenty of snow a little too much if you ask me. I just realized this year that i am the worst shoveler of snow ever!!! I don't know how this happened but i just never seem to know where to put the snow once it is on my shovel. I look at other peoples walk ways and cars they have nice neat paths mine is always a hot mess. My 75 year old mother shovels better than i do.

Well i seem to have made to my computer while in a good mood. I noticed the nicest thing while looking out of the trolley window on my ride home the other day. Have you ever noticed that a couple of days after snow has fallen it always sparkles on the surface ? well it does and it is one of the prettiest things i think i have seen in a while. I also seem to be having flash back memories from when i was a kid. I remember always looking out at my yard and thinking that the snow looked like frosting on a cake and that the trees and picnic table were decorations made of candy. I think i may of had a sugar addiction! I have always had a vivid imagination.

hmmmm....

I haven't been on here much and there is a reason for that. My mom always says " if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all" I don't want to be a downer or nasty . i have had some nice things to say at different times but by the time i get to my computer all those happy things poof gone. hopefully this will past because i have done some fun things that i want to write about. i just want to write them while in a good mood, so i can do them justice.

Birthday

My birthday was yesterday I turned 36. At my job we celebrated my birthday on Friday I got two very nice cards a really yummy cupcake from the bakery down the street, and a flower. It is a custom for our boss to give us a flower on our birthday. mine is very pretty.

My mom cooked a special dinner for me on Friday we had her chicken cutlets made from scratch, Delmonico potato's ( very cheesy ) and green beans with almonds and of course a lemon cake MMMMMMM. My brother gave me a 30 dollar gift card to old navy, my mom gave me a turtle necklace, fuzzy gloves, hello kitty knee socks, and some nice lip balm.

Saturday, the day of my actual birthday, I actually ran a lot of errands blah, but that's o.k because i went to a party that night. Now it wasn't an actual birthday party it was a post Christmas party ( it was originally planned on a day that had a storm ) I got to have disaster cake and a friend ( who couldn't be there) sent along a pretty candle that we used when i was sang too. Oh, and there was a group of my friends moms friends there and they kept telling me how young i looked and what nice skin i had so that was nice. I had some wine whoo hoo and OMG there was so much yummmy yummy food there!

so even though i have not been in the best of moods lately ( and my family bickered all through my special dinner) I did all in all have a nice birthday :)

the new year

New years eve was really nice this year. I hung out with a couple of friends, watched movies that had to do with new years, filled my face with Chinese food MMMMMMMMM. We slept over, it's more fun that way and it just isn't worth going home at 1 or 2 in the morning.

I know some people get very excited about the new year and what it will bring. I think i was one of those people at one time and i want to be one of them again, I just seem to be having a hard time feeling positive about the beginning of a new year. Maybe it's the catholic in me you know waiting for doom to arrive. Of the last two years did not have such a great start. I try to be positive and for the most part i am able to find joy in the smallest most simple things it just gets hard sometimes.